Our kids are capable of SO much.

I posted this on my Instagram account, but wanted to have it here as well.

"He hasn't been in any lakes this year.  He sits on the edge of the boat with his toes in the water and says "I'm getting used to it".  Then on the way home he'll say "I'll be brave next time and get in".  

He gets nervous at the lake.  Maybe it's the dark depths of black water, the waves, the potential of being run over by a boat, or the fish (sick).  But yesterday he decided it was time to get in.  So he climbed on the EZ ski.

As we let out the rope, I could see his face start to crumble.  And the tears well in his eyes.  And the immediate regret.  He looked up at me.  My instinct was to pull him back in.  But instead, the boat of siblings and cousins (and mom) erupted in screams and cheers.  "Yea Carter!  You can do it!"

We started to pull him behind the boat.  He looked down.   Still fighting the fear.  And then, he let go.  Literally and figuratively.  And the wind blew his hair and a small smile crept across his face.  And we continued to cheer.

When he climbed back onto the boat, he looked at me and said "I'm so proud of myself for doing that."

Our kids are capable of SO much.  We just have to be willing to let them fight through the fear.

TED. Ideas worth spreading. And listening to.

I listen to TED talks when I'm doing laundry, washing dishes, walking on the treadmill, driving in the car.  It's a great way to get through other things I'd rather not be doing.  A nice distraction from some of the mundane things I have to do.

Here are a few TED talks I think are worth listening to.

I love Brene Brown.  Her books are amazing.  Her speeches are equally amazing.





This one is surprisingly funny.  And definitely made me think about the direction our schools are going.




I REALLY loved this one by Amy Cuddy.  Powerful message about how our body language can shape how we think about ourselves and how successful we may become in our aspirations.  Although it has now made me super conscious about how I stand, sit, and interact with my body.  :)




Tony Robbins is always great to listen to.




I laughed out loud several times during Shawn Achor's speech.  Really funny, but also spot on about how happiness works.




This one is a little different and dramatic, but if you stick with it until the end, she ties it all together nicely with some talk about compassion.  Something our society desperately needs right now.




There you go.  Some "easy" listening during your chores or workouts.

What am I so "busy" doing anyway?

I've made a new addition for my wall.

I'm putting this in a spot I walk by and look at often in my home.  To remind me to slooooooow down.

I've been focusing a lot on my WHY.  Why I do what I do.  What's most important.  How I am using my time.  What is consuming most of my time.  Am I just busy or am I doing what matters most?  And does it all support my underlying why?

What can we eliminate as a family to have less "busy" and more intention?  What things will get us where we want to be?  And what things won't?

In his book, More or Less, Jeff Shinabarger says there has been "a recent cultural shift:  we now determine the significance of a person by how busy they are."

Something I think of often:  If Satan can't make you sin, he'll make you busy.  Either way, he keeps us from fulfilling a purposeful life.

If I were to strip the purpose of life down to the bare bones, I would say the only thing that counts is how we treat other people.  How we make other people feel.  What kind of real, authentic relationships we created.  How approachable we are.  How we LOVE other people.  How we love ourselves.  What we give back to other people (time, attention, love).

Bob Goff

Am I available?  Am I accessible?  Am I present?  Or am I too busy doing too many other things (even if those things are seemingly important)?

For some reason, when I (we) become increasingly busy, the first thing that suffers is my relationships. My time for other people, for service, for FUN, for leisure time just BEING with the people I love is often the first sacrifice.

 So I ask myself, if a friend calls and needs support, will I drop everything and go?  Will they even call me in the first place if they think I'm "too busy"?  If one of my kids needs some extra love and attention, can my "to do" list be put aside?  

Do I make sure I get quality time with my husband?  Do I make sure I take care of and nurture ME ?  Do I have enough time, and energy, to serve people around me?

What makes my soul come alive and how am I proactive in making time for those things?  The same for my kids and husband?  What makes us come alive as a family?

What do I spend my free time doing?  And why?  Do I even have free time?  If not, why?  Does my use of time reflect who I am and who I hope to become?

"We give lip service to the idea that people are supremely important.  But what does our use of time say is important?"
                                                                                                         Jeff Shinabarger

It's okay to slow down.  It's okay to not be busy all.the.time.  It's okay to take things off the schedule that don't support my WHY or the goals and ambitions of our family life.  It's OKAY TO SAY NO.  Because when I say "no" to one thing, I say "yes" to something that supports my why.  Something that matters MORE.

So I'm trying to slow down.  BE STILL.  Listen.  Pay attention.  Notice details.  Be deliberate with my time.  Nurture relationships with family, friends, and strangers.  And solely focus on what really matters to me.  People.  And love.

"Real Life Stories--Women of Inspiration". Jenny from The Happy Family Movement

I first met Jenny at the Breathe Intensive in Las Vegas several years ago.  We were only with each other in person for 4 hours, but have kept in touch ever since.

Jenny and her husband, Josh, started The Happy Family Movement, a site dedicated to helping families create a more meaningful life together.  And they are also about to launch a Kickstarter campaign for their newest idea to help families, the Phone Monster.  AND, they started the Summer Bucket List challenge to help families have a more adventurous, intentional summer with their families.  They're busy people. 

Jenny grew up in less than ideal circumstances.  But instead of letting a victim mentality consume her, she changed her story and is making a positive impact on the people around her.  She LOVES her kids and is constantly trying to create a great life story for her family.

Here we go.

1.  Give me a quick peek at your life story.

Oh, wow... a quick peek? Um... I grew up in a bad situation. My dad died when I was a kid and I never got to know him. My mom was into drugs and we had a bad relationship. I worked hard through high school and got a full ride scholarship to go to college. I got married, got my Master's Degree in Accounting, became a wedding photographer with my hubby, had three kids, started a family blog called The Happy Family Movement, and now I'm starting a new business called Phone Monsters. Whew!  Life is BUSY but wonderful

2.  Tell me about an "every day moment" you are grateful for

Every night at bedtime, we crawl into bed with each of our kiddos for our nightly 'snuggle chat'. We snuggle and talk about their day, their hopes, their fears, their dreams. It's really the only part of our day that's not usually chaotic and I love connecting with them.

3.  Tell me about one ambition you have right now

I just launched my new business Phone Monsters and I'm really focused on getting that off the ground! I want to build a company that creates products that help families connect more. 

4.  If you could speak on anything to a large group of women, what would you talk about?

I'm lucky enough that I get asked to speak to mother's groups fairly regularly and the one thing I always talk about is living intentionally and creating memorable experiences for your family.  I believe that it's SO important for every family to sit down and figure out exactly what your family values are.  Once you know what your values are, work on setting up habits that help you live intentionally within those values.  It benefits your family and it helps teach your kids more about living intentionally!

5.  What does the phrase "create a good life story" mean to you?

I love this phrase!!  To me, it's all about creating space to let good things happen.  It's about saying yes to adventure.  It's about going out and doing things instead of just talking about doing things.  It's embracing your fears and going for it anyway.  It's about turning off the TV or computer or the cell phone and going outside to play catch, or tag, or ride bikes.  It's about giving back and doing good in the world and teaching your kids to give back and do good.  It's about love....it's always about love!

6.  Tell me something someone taught you that made an impact on your life

We've learned so much about life and embracing who you are from SO many people we've met in the photography industry and other creative entrepreneurs.  

7.  Name one event in your life that has made a significant impact on the course of your life story

I quit my job to go back to school and get my Master's Degree.  We started our photography business at the same time.  It was the riskiest, craziest thing we had ever done and I'm still shocked today that we made such a crazy decision considering that up until that point, we played everything safe.

8.  What is something you want to accomplish you haven't yet?

I'd love to give a TED talk!

9.  What photographs are you most grateful for from your childhood or teen years?

I've got two photos of my dad that my grandpa gave me before he passed away.  They're the only connection I have to a dad I never knew and don't remember.

10.  What are you most proud of?

That I broke the cycle of neglect and abuse.  I'm not a perfect mother, but I'm a really good one and my kids know without a doubt that I love them.

11.  What is the best parenting advice/tip someone gave you?

I read a magazine article written by husband/wife nutritionists one time...Most of the article was how you should only give your kid a cupcake or treat on their birthday, etc.  But there was one nugget of info in there that was amazing!  They said you should give your kids HUGE servings of veggies at every meal, but never force them to eat all the veggies.  So I give my kids as much as a whole cup of veggies at every meal.  Sometimes they eat half the bowl, but sometimes they eat ALL the veggies.  I guarantee they eat WAY more veggies than they would if I gave them a smaller serving.  I know it's small thing, but it really works!

12.  Tell me something you are sure of

I am sure that every person on the planet has a special talent that the world needs.  We don't always know what it is immediately, but when we find it, it's our responsibility to share it with the world and make an impact.

13.  What is your favorite quote or life motto?

Say yes to adventure!

14.  What is your favorite part about yourself (not a physical trait)?

I'm very driven and focused.  I have a lot of confidence in my ability to get things done.  And if I believe in something, I won't let it fail because I won't give up until it succeeds.  

15.  What type of photographs do you wish you had more of?

Photos of my brothers and I as kids

16.  What is something you do to help drive away fear or anxiety?

I write myself encouraging notes on the good days so I can read them on the rough ones.  Even when everyone else believes in you and is encouraging you, sometimes you just need to remember that YOU believe in yourself too.

17.  What is your favorite part about being a mom?  Your least favorite part (just keepin it real on this question--I know you love your kids)?

My favorite part of being a mom is seeing my kids be amazing...sometimes that's sharing a cookie with someone, writing a nice note, standing up to a bully at school, picking up trash on the beach.  And sometimes it's Lia's silly dance moves, finding Ava hiding behind the chair with a book, and Max's serious obsession with whatever he's obsessed with at the moment...which right now is sharks.

My least favorite part has got to be bedtime.  Seriously!  Kids have no sense of urgency!  On the nights we don't have activities bedtime is much smoother.  But anytime we get home late and need to do super-fast-bedtime as we like to call it, I always feel frustrated at their stall tactics and when they get out of bed thirteen times.  Tell me I'm not alone in this!

18.  Tell me something about yourself that may surprise people

I'm an incredibly Type A, organized, plan everything kind of person, but I've learned to be spontaneous and be okay with that.

19.  What's one thing you wish you would have known when you were younger?

That's it's going to be okay.  That perfect attendance doesn't count for anything really.  That nobody will ever ask you or ever care what your GPA was after you graduate.  That you can find a way to make a living doing just about anything you love...seriously.

And for fun:

Favorite book:  HARRY POTTER!

Favorite family tradition:  oh my gosh...we have so many.  Probably riding bikes to the park on the 4th of July.  We watch the city fireworks display then bike home.  Our city allows people to shoot off fireworks, so the whole bike ride home feels like a fireworks serenade!

Something you enjoy doing with your spouse:  Exploring and adventuring.  we love to do active things!

Talent you wish you had:  I SO wish that I could sing

Favorite meal:  hmmm..Depends on the day, but I love good pizza, pretty much all Mexican food, and anything on the grill.

If you never had to do one specific thing again, what would it be:  EMAIL

Favorite show on TV:  I would say HIMYM, but it ended this week and they totally blew the ending.  So probably Brooklyn Nine-Nine or Parenthood.

Something that scares you:  Something happening to my hubby or kids

Favorite thing about your husband:  he loves to act ridiculous just to make me laugh

Something you can't live without:  Pepsi...I know it's terrible for me, but I love it so much!

What's something you think about often:  money.  I wish I had a better answer, but it's true.  One of the down sides to being an entrepreneur is having to constantly figure out where the next payment is coming from :)

THANK YOU for doing this interview Jenny!  And thank you for doing everything you can to do GOOD things in this world.


If you want to read other "Real Life Stories--Women of Inspiration" interviews, click here.

We're mom's. We save lives.

Sometimes when people ask me what I do, I like to say "I save lives".  Because truthfully, I do.  All day long.  I'm a mom.   And I think toddlers spend 80% of their day doing things that could kill them.  And we save them. 

And then those toddlers grow up and they continue to do things that could kill them, either physically or emotionally.  And we save them.

This video is worth your time.



The girls say their mom did someting unimaginable.  But she actually didn't.  Because I know EVERY SINGLE MOM out there would do just what that mom did and jump in front of the car.  Because her babies were inside.  And we love them more than we love our own life.  Notice I didn't say we love them more than we love ourselves.  I hope we love ourselves just as much as we love our kids.  But we'd definitely be willing to sacrifice our lives for theirs.

So please, please, please, Mom's, don't spend your days feeling guilty or sad.  Celebrate.  Celebrate the love you have for those kids.  And the lessons they have taught you that you probably couldn't learn any other way.

These girls said their mom continues to save their lives every.single.day. 

We save lives.  And you love your kids.  And those kids need YOU.  And THAT makes you a remarkable woman and mother.

"We create to find out what's true"

Let it be known, writing articles for this blog is not always easy for me.  Sometimes, it's actually quite hard.  And super uncomfortable.  

I grew up not sharing many emotions.  So doing that on this blog doesn't come naturally or easy for me.

But I'm trying to embrace being intentionally uncomfortable.  Because apparently it's good for growth.  At least that's what people keep telling me.

Writing in a space like this can be risky.  People seem to think that commenting on facebook, or a blog post doesn't hurt people when they say something mean.  Or maybe they do know it hurts people and they do it anyway.  Regardless, writing, especially about things of the heart, is a vulnerable adventure.  

I fully recognize I may not always be right.  But I write to find truth.  And in the moment I write something, that IS my truth.  In that moment.

Each day, sometimes each moment, I change.  And become someone new.  And writing helps me grow.  Writing helps EVERYONE grow.  Whether you share it with the world, or keep it to yourself.  Writing seems to make things more clear.  It helps me find truth.

I read the following quote about writing and it was a perfect nudge to keep on doing what I'm doing.  Because I believe in building a community of people around this blog who want to live intentional lives and create better life stories.

"Don't waste your time, energy, and heart defending yourself.  Not because your're not wrong, but because of course you're wrong.  Anybody who doesn't know that we are most certainly all wrong is a little scary to me.  

Luckily, art is not about right and wrong.  We don't create to find out what's right, we create to find out what's true.  Right now.  Not forever, right exactly now.  And what's true is whatever was born inside your moment of creativity.  Create your true thing and then let it loose into the world to do what it will....

Every moment I'm someone new.  This is why we writers never stop writing.  Not because there is new material--but because WE are new material"
                                                          Glennon Doyle Melton

Everyone's a writer.  And everyone is a "creative".  Whether you know it or not.  So if you've considered it, give it a whirl.  It may just change your life.

Re-born. It's transplant day!

My friend, Lisa, is getting her bone marrow transplant today and tomorrow.  It's called a Second Birthday because it's like you're being reborn.

And may we pause for a minute and celebrate the fact that she kicked cancer OUT of her body.  Stage 4 Lymphoma and her screens came back clean.  Incredible.

If you haven't read about Lisa, start here.

For those of you who participated in our peace project, I thank you with every ounce of sincerity in my body.  Thank you.  Thank you.  Thank you.

The collage is finished.  Just need to print it and get it up on her wall!

Here are some closer shots so you can find yourselves.

And here's a little slideshow of all of you peace givers.  I'm hoping Nickell can just loop it over and over on the days it feels hard to fight!  



Please continue to remember her in your prayers.  There is power in numbers.   And she still has many hard days ahead of her.

HAPPY SECOND BIRTHDAY my friend.  You have an army of people supporting you.  We ALL love you and may your soul have peace during your fight.

Fear Not to Do Good.

I was reading scripture one day and came across these verses:

"Fear not to do good, my sons, for whatsoever ye sow, that shall ye also reap. …

“Fear not, little flock; do good; let earth and hell combine against you, for if ye are built upon my rock, they cannot prevail. …

“Look unto me in every thought; doubt not, fear not."

I remember thinking to myself, why would I ever FEAR to do good??  That's such an odd thing to say.

But the more I thought about it, the more I realized I fear to do good all the time.  I'll get a thought to say something nice to someone and be embarrassed to say it.  Or worry they'll think I'm weird (which I am, but still).

I'll get a feeling to stop by a friends house and check in on them, but then second guess myself and think I'm intruding or bugging them.

I'll feel a strong impression to e-mail, text, or call someone, but I worry about what they'll think.  Or I won't have the right thing to say.

Or I'll feel compelled to pursue something in my life that could benefit myself, or even a lot of people, and I'll resist.  Out of fear.  Out of the unknown.  Out of uncertainty.

The truth is, I fear to do good all the time.

But once I realized this about myself, I decided I was going to try and change.

So now, with any thought that pops in my head, I ask "is it good?", and "will it help someone else?" and if it passes those two questions, then I tell myself "then do it."  It's not always easy, but I am trying.  

Now for the record, I have a LOT of things pop up in my head, and most of them are good.  Realistically I don't have time to do all of them.  But I do as many as I can.  And I fight the fear that often accompanies those things (even if they are seemingly small).

If it's good, do it.  Fear Not to DO GOOD.